Captain Egghead

"This is Captain Egghead speaking."

Guaranteed to flabbergast anyone without their headphones in. ✈️

Get Captain Egghead — £14.99/year

$19.99/year · €17.99/year

Quietly brilliant. Suspiciously well-informed.

The problem

You're flying over France again. 🇫🇷

You know that moment in the cruise when you're supposed to say something interesting about where you are? And you end up saying... "we're currently flying over France."

Yeah. The passengers can see France on the screen. They know about France. France doesn't need the introduction.

Captain Egghead fixes that. Enter your city pair, get a handful of route-specific facts that are actually worth saying out loud. Geography, history, records, things you can see from 38,000 feet. The good stuff.

Forget that 3G landing. It's your sharp-witted PAs that count.

How it works

Three steps. Thirty seconds. Sound brilliant.

✈️

Enter your city pair

Type in departure and destination airport codes. Or search any country or landmark directly. Works for every route on earth.

🧠

Get route-specific facts

Captain Egghead calculates your great circle route, identifies every country and major geographic feature you cross, and serves up the most interesting facts from each one.

📋

Pick your favourites and read them out

Tap to select the facts you like. One tap copies them to your clipboard, numbered and ready. The most interesting person on the flight deck. Probably.

Example facts

The kind of thing you'll actually want to say.

LBA → PMI route · 1,626km · Mediterranean crossing 🌊

The Pyrenees extend 430 kilometres from the Bay of Biscay to the Mediterranean Sea, forming the natural land boundary between France and Spain. The highest peak, Aneto in Spain, reaches 3,404 metres. The principality of Andorra sits entirely within the range between the two countries.

📍 Pyrenees

The Mediterranean Sea covers approximately 2.5 million square kilometres and is connected to the Atlantic Ocean only through the Strait of Gibraltar, which is 14 kilometres wide at its narrowest point. The sea loses more water to evaporation than it receives from rainfall and rivers, and is kept in balance by continuous inflow from the Atlantic.

📍 Mediterranean Sea

France is the most visited country in the world, receiving approximately 90 million international tourists each year — more than its entire resident population of 68 million.

📍 France

Spain has more UNESCO World Heritage Sites than almost any other country, with 50 designated sites including the Alhambra, the Sagrada Família, and the historic city of Toledo.

📍 Spain

Works offline ✈️

Obviously it works offline. You're at 38,000 feet.

We're not amateurs. 🛫

Captain Egghead downloads everything to your device on first load — airports, country boundaries, facts — and works completely offline from that point on. No signal required. No subscription check at altitude. What's on your iPad is your business. 🥚

Add it to your home screen and it runs like a native app. No app store involved. Works on any device with a browser. Your crew will think you're a genius. You don't need to correct them.

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No signal needed

Everything is downloaded to your device. Works at FL400 over the middle of nowhere.

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Add to home screen

Installs like an app directly from your browser. No App Store, no update nags.

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Save your favourites

Star facts you use regularly. They're stored on your device and always available.

Pricing

One price. Everything included.

Captain Egghead 🥚

£14.99

per year · $19.99 · €17.99

✅ Unlimited route lookups
✅ Route mode + search mode
✅ Favourites list
✅ Works completely offline
✅ Every country and landmark on earth
✅ New facts added regularly

Get Captain Egghead

Keep Captain Egghead to yourself. Let your colleague think you're just naturally this interesting.

What pilots are saying 👨‍✈️

Quietly brilliant. Suspiciously well-informed.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"I've been flying for eighteen years and this is the first time a passenger has started clapping at something I said. Worth every penny."

Capt. James M.

Long-haul carrier, Europe

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"Finally something I can use in the cruise besides 'we're currently at FL380'. The Mediterranean facts are genuinely brilliant."

F/O Sarah K.

Short-haul carrier, UK

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"I thought my PAs were fine. Then I tried Captain Egghead. I did not think my PAs were fine after that."

Capt. Rodrigo A.

Charter carrier, Southern Europe