Captain Egghead

"This is Captain Egghead speaking."

Forget that 3G landing. It's your sharp-witted PAs that count. ✈️

Get Captain Egghead — £14.99/year

$19.99/year · €17.99/year

Quietly brilliant. Suspiciously well-informed.

Route facts for your cruise announcements.

Captain Egghead is a tool for commercial airline pilots. Enter your departure and destination airport codes, and it calculates your great circle route, identifies every country and major geographical feature you cross, and returns a set of facts — ready to read out during the cruise.

The database covers every country on earth and 24 major geographical features, including oceans, mountain ranges, deserts, and seas. Facts cover geography, record-breaking statistics, geology, and history. They are factual, specific, and written to be spoken aloud to a mixed audience.

The number of facts scales with route length — short sectors get four, long-haul gets nine. The app always prioritises facts about countries you actually cross, with at least one fact about your destination.

Guaranteed to flabbergast anyone without their headphones in.

Three steps. Thirty seconds. Sound brilliant.

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Enter your city pair

Type in departure and destination airport codes. Or search any country or landmark directly. Works for every route on earth.

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Get route-specific facts

Captain Egghead calculates your great circle route, identifies every country and major geographic feature you cross, and serves up the most interesting facts from each one.

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Pick your favourites and read them out

Tap to select the facts you like. One tap copies them to your clipboard, numbered and ready. The most interesting person on the flight deck. Probably.

The kind of thing you'll actually want to say.

LHR → LAX · 5,440 miles (8,756 km) · North Atlantic, Greenland, Canada ✈️

Heathrow Airport handles more international passengers than any other airport in the world — around 80 million a year — through just two runways. That's fewer runways than Paris, Frankfurt, or Amsterdam, and the subject of a planning dispute that's lasted over 20 years.

📍 United Kingdom

The Greenland Ice Sheet contains enough frozen water that, if it fully melted, global sea levels would rise by approximately 7.2 metres — enough to swamp most of the world's coastal cities. The ice at the centre is 3,370 metres thick and has been there for at least 2.4 million years.

📍 Greenland Ice Sheet

Canada has more lakes than all other countries on earth combined, holding around 60 per cent of the world's fresh lake water. Almost all of them are a legacy of the last ice age — retreating glaciers left behind so many rock basins that the country essentially became the world's largest natural reservoir.

📍 Canada

The Grand Canyon was carved entirely by the Colorado River and took around 5 to 6 million years. It's 446 kilometres long, up to 29 kilometres wide, and more than 1,800 metres deep. The oldest exposed rock at its base formed approximately 1.84 billion years ago — roughly 40 per cent of the age of the earth itself.

📍 United States of America

Works completely offline. Obviously. ✈️

The entire database — 4,500+ airports, every country boundary, all facts — is available to access offline after your first visit. No internet connection required at altitude. No subscription check mid-flight. What's on your iPad is your business. 🥚

Add it to your home screen and it runs like a native app. No App Store. Works on any device with a browser. Your crew will think you're a genius. You don't need to correct them.

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No signal needed

Everything is downloaded to your device. Works at FL400 over the middle of nowhere.

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Add to home screen

Installs like an app directly from your browser. No App Store, no update nags.

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Save your favourites

Star facts you use regularly. They're stored on your device and always available offline.

One price. Everything included.

Captain Egghead 🥚

£14.99

per year · $19.99 · €17.99

✅ Unlimited route lookups
✅ Route mode + search mode
✅ Favourites list
✅ Works completely offline
✅ Every country and landmark on earth
✅ Facts updated regularly

Get Captain Egghead

Keep Captain Egghead to yourself. Let your colleague think you're just naturally this interesting.

What pilots are saying 👨‍✈️

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"I've been flying for eighteen years and this is the first time a passenger has started clapping at something I said. Worth every penny."

Capt. James M.

Long-haul carrier, Europe

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"Finally, something interesting to say in the cruise rather than 'we're at 38,000 feet'."

F/O Sarah K.

Short-haul carrier, UK

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"I thought my PAs were fine. Then I tried Captain Egghead. I did not think my PAs were fine after that."

Capt. Rodrigo A.

Charter carrier, Southern Europe